Being Everything For Everyone

We cannot be everything for everyone, and others cannot be everything for us. Often, we struggle with our expectations of other people and the roles we want them to play in our lives. As a result, we frequently find ourselves disappointed when they do not meet these expectations. These expectations often stem from our own past hurts. When we experience pain, our beliefs about how things should be and how people should act become necessities for us, but this mindset only sets us up for disappointment.

The same principle applies to forgiveness. When someone has hurt us, we often wait for an apology before we feel okay. However, many times the person who hurt us does not apologize—either because they do not believe they did anything wrong or for other reasons. If we wait for an apology to move on, we may remain stuck in our disappointment, as this expectation may never be fulfilled. Even if we receive an apology, it does not change what happened, so unless we heal from that particular situation, the apology may ultimately lack significance. It is vitally important that we heal from the inside out; we need spiritual transformation.

This disappointment can also arise when we seek help from others. If they do not provide what we need or fulfill the expectations we have set in our minds, we may feel rejected or let down.

I recently read that we often try to be excellent travel agents as we plan guilt trips for those who fail to meet our expectations. We were never meant to rely on other people for our true needs—our fulfillment should come from Jesus. He paid a great price for us to receive everything we need in this life.

We live in a flawed world among people who may themselves be hurt, in pain, or not fully healed. It is unrealistic to expect something from individuals who cannot provide what we seek. God will never let us down. We must look to Him for everything we need, including the strength to forgive others. Forgiveness is not something we can achieve on our own; we need help, and that help comes from the Lord.

As Psalm 62:5

My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him."